2 good books = an excellent morning

I woke up to the sounds of my children in the kitchen and knew it was time to get up, but before I did I told myself I was going to get back in bed once they were off to school and finish reading my book. Today just happened to be a morning I could take slowly and so I took advantage. Love that.

I had about 80 pages left in The Giver by Lois Lowry and finished rather quickly. I really liked the book and the message it taught about life. It was a great reminder to me that in this life we will face sadness, heartache, loneliness, etc., but with those deep torturing emotions we will have joy and happiness that will equal it if not go beyond. So of the lowest lows we face we will also find the highest highs...a beautiful lesson in life that I chose and am once again reminded of and am grateful for.

The second book I finished was Stop Whining, Start Living by Dr. Laura. It was a wonderfully empowering book that reminded me I have the power to change my life. If I don't like it and it's not going the way I want then I need to do something about it. She reminded me that I'm responsible for me and in the end if I'm unsatisfied with my life I have only me to blame. I fear that, I do. I fear facing the Lord and seeing the life I could of had if I just enjoyed it more. So I choose joy, and I don't mean to say that I haven't been happy or that I'm not happy now, but in the past I certainly let things get in my way. So now when faced with problems and frustrations my goal is to do my venting (yes I know whining is helpful in letting go), get it out, and then move on. Too often I've held onto it, sometimes it's just easier to be sad, and I believe sadness has it's place (I mean it helps us to see how truly happy we can be), but I know I need to move on from it and not let it take over what could be a beautiful experience. No matter what I face in this life I ultimately choose how I'm going to react and I want, more than ever, to see the good and I believe I can.

Sorry I just went off on all that, but let's just be honest, I'm going to need it in about 2 weeks when I've forgotten. I believe that is my challenge. I mean, I already know this stuff that she's talking about which is why I said it's a reminder, but I'm not so good at being consistent. I'm going to need extra help from those who love me to help push me back on the path I so desperately want to walk.

I know this flower looks a little crazy, but I was drawn to it this morning because each blossom is not standing on there own, but clumped together waiting to show the world there beauty...reminded me that we really do need each other to bloom.

So it's been a fabulous morning, a morning full of encouraging thoughts about life and living. It certainly wasn't a coincidence I chose live to be my focus this year.

I hope you have a fabulous weekend.

my word my focus 2008

Is anyone else spinning by the recent renewal of another year?

I've had a lot on my mind the last few days, thinking about this last year and what it has meant to me. It was a big year for me with a lot of growth opportunities that I am very grateful for. I grew in many areas and surprised myself tremendously by doing things I didn't know I was capable of.

I was amazed to see as I focused on DO, my word for the year, just how one simple two letter word could make such an impact. I guess it's true when something is in your heart and mind you start seeing it everywhere and for me it just happened to help put and keep me in action. It was the exact reason why I needed to choose DO, I really needed a jump start, and one of the reasons why I seriously considered keeping it for 2008, but I won't and this why.

Once I realized how important choosing a word could be I prayerfully thought about what I need to work on this year. I have had a word in my mind the last few week, but told myself if I didn't feel strongly about it I would definitely keep DO because it made such an impact. Then yesterday I got a package (Adam forgot to tell me the package came Monday) from my friend, Heidi, and in it enclosed the book Dance While You Can by Lance Wubbels (I can't find it on amazon). It's a book with gentle reminders to help you live life to the fullest with beautiful photos to match. As I went to flip through it the first page I came to was the introduction and this is what I found...

First I was dying to finish high school and start college.
And then I was dying to finish college and start working.
And then I was dying to marry and have children.
And then I was dying for my children to grow old enough so I could get back to my career.
And then I was dying to retire.
And now I am dying...and suddenly realized that I forgot to live.

author unknown

The moment I read these words I knew that my initial thought, the word I had been thinking about for a few weeks had been right all along.


Live.

It is a lot like do in many ways, which is why I had been holding on to it, but evokes more passion and love of life that I could ever get from DO. It implies letting go of fears and focusing on the good of my everyday. Being ok with my mistakes, learning from them, and moving on. It implies living in the present, at 31 with all it's challenges. Enjoying my children at their current ages and not wishing that time away. Giving my Adam all of myself. Being grateful for the life I have and everything in it. It implies intentionally going about my day making it the best I can.

Adam once asked me, what is one thing you're afraid of and the first thing that came to my mind was I wouldn't live my life to the fullest, that I would die regretting how I lived. This year living shall be my focus and hopefully my focus every year after that. I don't want life to just happen to me anymore. I want to take it by the reins and create a beautiful story that wasn't there before. My story. A story of life, passion, happiness, and love.