Change was coming.
That night Adam was asked to accept a calling as the 1st counselor in the bishopric for our ward (an LDS bishop is over the welfare of the individuals in the ward boundary and the counselor is just that, there to help and counsel. for those of you who don't know being a part of a bishopric is a very time intensive calling of service). I had hoped for a long time that I wouldn't have to share him knowing full well that surely the time would come when I would.
Just because you know something is right doesn't mean it comes easy. I cried a lot those first few days. I admit to feeling very selfish about what this would do to our family life. The weight of no more Sunday afternoons lying in bed talking or sitting in church leaning over and putting my head on his shoulder or watching him make cookies with the girls broke me down. I didn't want to give those things up. I am ashamed of these emotions and am not proud of myself for thinking only of me when I know this calling will push and stretch him as well and that he will need my support...I do fully support him.
He said to me one night while we were talking about changes that might take place, I am so glad I took the time when I had the chance to spend it with the girls making cookies and just being with them on Sundays." I'm so grateful for all the Sundays we've had together and that he's such an active father in their life because I do feel like my girls will have to lean on those memories at times. I am forever grateful for Adam's example to not think of himself, but to give and do. I know there's not one thing he wouldn't do for me or his family and I know he will approach his new responsibility the same way.
As I sat listening to the beautiful blessing that was given to him today I was at peace. I know it will be a blessing for our family. Life is changing...all is well.
12 comments:
I feel your pain. But, I can also offer hope. I've noticed a much more concerted effort on Jay's part to be with the boys after all the Sunday stuff because, even though he's tired, he's goodly tired, which is totally different from work tired.
Anyways, I feel for you. You described your conflict perfectly and it will be a loss. But, most definitely a gain for your ward! And, in the end, your family.
My Adam was called during his two year hiatus from his residency. We were finally going to church as a family and then... BLAST! It was tough, but it was such a great time for him and was awesome to see him gain a strong friendship with the other men he served with.
It was bound to happen, so it's fortunate you had him on the bench with you for this long.
It will be wonderful for the girls to see him up on the stand and to hear him speak, lead and serve all the time. It's great timing really. At least you don't have to wrangle little kids alone. Our first councilor's wife has a 5, 3, and 15 month old to wrangle and has been doing so for 4 years!
I think just about any woman in your position would go through the same emotions. I know I would.
Amy,
My husband is also the first counselor in the bishopric. We are moving on three years now. Crying came for me as well. One small line in a favorite hymn brought peace...
"Be thou humble in thy calling and the Lord thy God shall lead thee~ shall lead thee by the hand and give thee answers to thy prayer."
It sounds as though YOUR prayers are for quality time. It also sounds as if you are incredibly humbled through this process...mmm...how everything will work beautifully... how they WILL be answered for you.
I am inspired by your blog and quietly applaud the moments YOU have preserved of the love shared on the Sabbath.
Things may change- and greatness will come because of it!
Amy
P.S. I changed my profile for today- showing my families blog. I did this in case you wanted to see who it is that keeps commenting.
From one Amy to another... have a great Thanksgiving.
My husband too has been in a bishopric and it was very hard at times and time consuming, but it was fun to see him grow in his calling, my patience grew and I know that we were blessed. Good luck, from what you write about him, the people in you're ward will be lucky to have him serving them.
My husband, Franck, was called as Branch President in the beginning of this year... We did the same, thinking about changes. Now, almost one year after that, we realise that the changes are not what we thought they would be. It is a calling for HIM (that he might progress) and not for changing things in the branch first.
I don't know if it makes sense, but I testify that the inspired callings are always for our good, and you'll see that you'll be bless.
Anymay, I guess that Branch President in our branch of 20 members, is not taking the same time than 1st counselor in your ward of ? members....
The most important thing in one or the other situation, is to obey and to be ready to serve! That's when we learn and be strenghtened!
This is a huge change - but a great one. I remember the first time that Jason was in the Bishopric our littles were really little - when he was released they didn't want him to sit with us - they wanted to look at him on the stand! Too funny!
Great blessings come with this calling for him and your family
I'm sure you'll be blessed and you'll get through it just fine. Be glad that you have a husband who is worthy and willing to fulfill this calling! That's a wonderful thing. Also the example that he is setting for your girls as he serves each Sunday, and every other day (and probably some nights). I know it's hard to see your routine changing but I am sure there will be lots of great blessings that come with it. At least your kids aren't babies- my friend Britney wrangles 4 under the age of 8 every week b/c her husband is in the bishopric of a student ward! Could be worse!
(((bighugs)))
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