City lights

Can't help, but fall in love with this city -- especially at night in the rain.

randoms from the airport

I'm sitting at the airport this morning getting ready to board my flight. I'm heading to New York first for a few days before I head to New Hampshire for Squam. It's hard for me to believe it's already that time again. I am looking forward to another great class and the connections I'll make that only happen deep in the woods.

But first New York. Back in the day when I was making my flight arrangements I didn't realize I would be in the city during 9/11. I have to say there is a layer of trepidation, but i am grateful for the coincidence. Can't imagine visiting the big apple any other time.

After enjoying breakfast this morning we had a fun lighthearted ride to the airport. I wasn't quite expecting the reactions I received, though I can't imagine why I didn't, they were so true to them. Bella gave me a big hug, told me to have fun and not to worry, they would be ok. Tess barely gave me a hug claiming 8 days is not long enough to miss. I disagree, even Adam misses after 3 days. Megan, poor meg, cried and cried. Makes it so much harder to walk away when there's tears. Sure do miss them!

How come you're always famished and in need of a bathroom when you fly?? Maybe it's just me, but the complimentary peanuts are a must.

The colors are already beginning to cover our mountains -- they were so beautiful as we flew over them. I've never seen them change so early and I'm thinking it must be a result of the crazy dry summer we had. I hope it doesn't peak when I'm gone -- it's one of my favorite parts of the year.

Fast forward.

Funny how it takes an entire day to post since I'm in and out of service constantly. Right now I'm sitting on the plane for who knows how long waiting to take off. Apparently the big storm in NY is causing problems. Bleh! They keep pushing back the time and I'm wondering now if I won't be spending the night in the airport??

Anyway I better sign off. I had hoped to add some photos, but my phone is quickly dying.

Till next time :) Hope your having a great weekend!

everyone is

the fulfilled life is a consequence, a gratifying byproduct. It’s what happens when you’re thinking about more important things. Climb the mountain not to plant your flag, but to embrace the challenge, enjoy the air and behold the view. Climb it so you can see the world, not so the world can see you. Go to Paris to be in Paris, not to cross it off your list and congratulate yourself for being worldly. Exercise free will and creative, independent thought not for the satisfactions they will bring you, but for the good they will do others, the rest of the 6.8 billion—and those who will follow them. And then you too will discover the great and curious truth of the human experience is that selflessness is the best thing you can do for yourself. The sweetest joys of life, then, come only with the recognition that you’re not special.

Because everyone is.

-David McCullough (Wellesley Commencement)

hello again

For the past couple of weeks I have felt a pull back to my blog. I can't be sure why I took such a long break. What I thought would only be days turned into weeks and months, but it's apparently what I needed. I have always tried to be true to myself and never force the words when I'm just not feeling it.

With school officially starting Monday the tides are turning around here and we are all mentally preparing for another school year ahead. While I have loved this summer together, I can't believe it's already coming to an end, I am ready, and I believe the girls are too, to get back into a schedule and regular routine. Since I was a school aged girl September has always felt like January, the beginning of a new year, making goals and reevaluating. This September has been no different.

In fact, getting offline this summer has given me a lot of time to think and reflect. I have felt for sometime that I'm at a bit of a crossroads and I haven't been entirely sure which direction to go. I continue to use my camera, but even my photography wants/needs to evolve. Upon reflection I feel I've been too stagnant for far too long and I need to step it up. I have missed, desperately, being creative and it's time now to stop missing and starting moving.

Bringing my blog back to life feels like the first step. This past week I have felt my juices flowing and my eagerness to leave the lazy summer days behind and get back to work.

Hello friends! It's good to be back :)

12of12 | August

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01. Just waking up.
02. Making my rounds waking up the girls and came across this printout on Bella's night stand. I think there is too much One Direction in my life right now.
03. We attempted yet again to create a gorgeous huge hanging flower arrangement, but to no avail. For the third year in a row the flowers didn't multiply. I told Adam next year we just need to buy them all grown.
04. Took photos of the Primary children at church today. Luckily they were patient as I did them one at a time.
05. The fruit is almost ready to be picked.
06. Waiting for Bella and Megan to open the door for me this afternoon -- it was locked. They teased me for a bit, making me wait longer, knowing I would take their photo. They are becoming more and more aware of the twelfth every month.
07. A little girl at church asked to take my photo after I had taken hers and without relinquishing my camera completely, she was 4 after all, she took this. I quite like the way it highlighted love.
08. Cookie dough -- a must on Sundays.
09. Pet Shops. All lined up and ready for play.
10. Minutes before lunch/dinner.
11. Tickle fight.
12. Met up with our friends to put the finishing touches on our Jackson Hole trip. We leave Wednesday. I'm excited for one more get away.

Although I didn't get to take my much enjoyed Sunday nap, the day was full of all kinds of goodness. Wish I was able to capture them all on film. For instance, there was a moment today I would like to remember, but didn't document -- Bella speaking in church for the first time. If I wouldn't have been looking at her I would have guessed she was a 20 year old. So confident with such a great message. She amazes me daily.

I hope you all had a great day. Share away :)

12of12 reminder

Hello friends! Lately my blog has not been calling to me so I apologize for my absence. I'm hoping when the busyness of the summer is over and I'm on more of a schedule my blog will not be so neglected. I have missed.

I am, however, still playing along with the 12of12 so I am here reminding you that tomorrow is the 12th. I hope you have a fabulous Sunday and look forward to seeing you back here to share. :)

12of12 | July

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01. Megan had the hardest time getting up this morning. Even though it's summer we still have violin at 6:45am. Bummer.
02. Found these flowers on the way into violin. The one perk about being up early in the summer -- you get to watch the sunrise.
03. Bella has been joining me in the front passenger seat lately. I've quite enjoyed her company next to me.
04. We went to boondocks today and Tess and I couldn't stop laughing on the race track. We had the slowest car and kept getting passed up by everyone. She can't wait until she's tall enough to ride the big cars herself.
05. It was such a riot on the bumper boats. How come it is so much fun to attack your family with water?
06. We all got seriously soaked on the bumper boats, but it was nice for once to not feel so blasted hot.
07. Spent some time in the batting cages. I have to say I did fairly well for a girl who hasn't picked up a bat in 20+ years.
08. Laser tag continues to be one of the funnest games we play together as a family. So much smack is happening at the beginning of the game about who will dominate. You won't hear if from me though. I don't know what it is, but I'm horrible at this game. Even my girls beat my highest score. Pathetic!
09. Taylor, my 15 year old niece who has a drivers permit, is a ruthless driver. Should I be afraid of her on the road? She saw an opening and edged Amy and Estee out of our way. Can't say it wasn't fun.
10. Sweet little Lewis. He was along for the ride today and was, for the most part, happy about it. Have really enjoyed the extra time with him. What a delightful boy.
11. Megan counting up her tickets -- she ended up with 456. I thought it was a ton for her, but she was quickly disappointed when she realized the big bear she wanted was 5000 tickets. Keep in mind the big bear can be found at Costco for close to $20. Looks like I know what to get for Christmas.
12. My dad and sister Jeni being, well, being them. I adore these two. So wish she lived close. I had it when our time is over.

What a fabulous day! When my sister suggested we go to boondocks Thursday I didn't realize it was the twelfth. In fact, I'm actually not a fan of having a big activity on the twelfth. I prefer to capture daily life, but then again, I suppose that's what we were doing. The best of times!

Hope you all had a great day!

Technical difficulties

I'm having issues with my Internet and am relying on my phone right now to let you know. Unfortunately I don't have a way to get my photo collage posted without the Internet so I'll get it posted as soon as I can figure it out. Hopefully as sooner than later! I hate when technology fails us.

pause + reminder

This little girl felt under the weather yesterday which gave us all reason to take pause. This summer has been so busy I don't think I've had one week at home yet so I welcomed the change.

I'm not complaining though, it's been a fabulous summer. One of these days when I get my act together I'll let you know what we've been up to.

For now, I want to remind you all that tomorrow is the twelfth. Looking forward to seeing how many of you are playing along out of town.

Enjoy documenting your day!

canyonlands

The campsite Devils Kitchen in Canyonlands National Park lived up to it's name. Not only was it treacherous to get to, it was a balmy 102 degrees. I admit, when we first started off on this adventure I wasn't sure we were going to make it out alive, let alone with our Land Rover intact. I'm happy to report, we did both and it was a fabulous jeeping/camping trip in Southern Utah. The campsite was absolutely breathtaking and the hike to slot canyon, a lot of fun. I was happy I made it all the way through the slot -- quite the challenge and not to be attempted by anyone who's claustrophobic.

Moab is like no where else on earth. I look forward to going back.











































Go here to see more photos. :)

squam art workshops | june 2012 | part two

Remember how absolutely blessed you are to have this woman in your life? Remember the part she played in getting you on the road you know you were meant to follow? Remember how she looked into your eyes two years ago and you knew you were enough, that you belonged? Remember how much you love her?


Remember how excited you were to teach? How many hours you spent preparing, and how long you had thought about that moment? It was everything you dreamed it would be, remember? Absolutely everything you wanted. 


Remember what it felt like to meet your class for the first time as they trickled in after lunch? How willing and eager you all were to be there and learn together? You couldn't have asked for a better group of women. You loved every minute of it.

Remember how 3 hours (1st half of class) passed way too quickly and you wanted to slow it all down because the experience was moving way too fast?



Remember how much you enjoyed getting to know them and by the end of the second day you wanted to meet up with them again? I hope and pray our paths cross in the future.



Remember walking back to your cabin with a skip in your step, a twinkle in your eye, elated, feeling like absolutely anything was possible?

Remember the words, if you're prepared you need not fear? How very true those words are.



Remember how you covered yourself with bug spray because the mesquites were merciless? Luckily the spray Jill let you borrow was the nice smelling natural kind. Thanks Jill.

Remember how you missed your friends, Jenica and Amy who brought you there?



Remember how you sat at dinner long after everyone had left talking with Tory and Thea about photography? What we wanted, possible changes, our goals, and personal projects. You loved how quickly the conversation meandered toward meaningful things. Remember how it felt to walk away closer then when you began?



Remember listening to cute Alena and Maya talking about their recent book publications? They are both amazing inspiring woman.

Remember how Michelle and Jen and Elizabeth and Lauren popped up everywhere? How they were willing to do any and everything for you to make your experience magical? They did so much work before, during, and after to make squam absolutely wonderful. THANK YOU!!

Remember when you walked in on the girls, my cabin-mates, learning to belly dance? How could you forget how effortlessly Fiona was able to do the shimmy.



Remember sitting on the couch crocheting a hat, that ended up way too big, talking to Thea late into the night? How your conversion passed all the niceties, the pleasantries, and went straight inside? How you went to bed feeling like she understood you a little better and vice versa? How you're convinced you were always meant to be friends. Remember what you love most about squam? How it brings you together, your walls come down, and you leave fuller than when you came.



Remember how your prayer was answered? How He provided the opportunity?

Remember how you only regretted one thing about the whole trip -- not taking a photo of your class. I guess I was just too much in the moment that I missed it.





Remember how great it felt to sit on the dock and chat in the sun? How you couldn't bear to get in the cold water again, but how refreshing it was just to put your feet in? Remember thinking it was a perfect way to spend a carefree Saturday afternoon when all your work was done. You loved watching Cal work and getting to know her and the lovely Jen Gray, Tory, Jonatha, Jessica, Rebecca, and Helene better.


[photo by tory williams]

Remember how Tory and you left to take photos with her film camera in the white bathtub? It was so dark in the bathroom you were surprised she was able to get a clear picture. You still haven't seen the film, but love the digital ones she took. She has an amazing eye.

Remember how much she loved your home town and how you wanted to take her home with you? How her curly hair matched her happy countenance. Remember days before you barely new her name and now you couldn't imagine her not in your life? Love this girl.





Remember after dinner playing on the dock with Thea, attempting to capture the fading light and then messing around taking self portraits? You definitely found a kindred spirit.





Remember how great the art fair was Saturday night and how amazingly talented all the artist were? Remember how you wished you could have bought one of each?


Remember sitting in Tory's room with Thea chatting and laughing while they both packed. Remember how you wished Saturday had not come so quickly, but grateful to have met and had squam to get to know one another.


[instagrams]

Remember walking out of the dock Sunday morning to say goodbye until September, but instead felt compelled to write? You were only okay to leave because you knew you'd be back.

Remember how you shared a plane ride with Helene and she was the last person from squam you got to say goodbye t?

Remember sitting on the plane thinking how truly amazing it is to see friendships forming and feel like they were always there just waiting for you all to find each other?

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Squam has this way of opening me in places I've been afraid to unlock and filling me up in ways I never knew I was empty. Every time I leave I have always felt a better version of myself -- ready and able to face the road ahead.

Go here to see my squam photos in full.

squam art workshops | june 2012 | part one

I've been sitting with my thoughts for over a week now hoping the words would begin to flow and I would be able to adequately express what this experience meant to me. I suppose it's always hard to attempt to sum up an experience that is so near and dear to your heart in words. When something touches your core there are no words that can possibly do it justice, but I attempt nevertheless because I long to remember.

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Remember how calm you felt as you boarded the plane?

Remember how you felt on the shuttle talking to the driving Joe? Butterflies in your stomach as you made your way to the lake and he told you all about his artist son who just graduated from school, his daughter who's married -- he said he finally felt like his kids had moved on. He rambled on keeping you company as you enjoyed the green landscape.

Remember what it felt like to pull up to Brae Cove again and put your luggage in the same room? Time stood still as you walked in the living room and took it all in -- the smell, the warmth -- and remembered what it was like back in September. You had this moment of panic wondering how this experience would compare to last fall (it was so amazing) and then you realized it would be exactly what it needed to be -- and it was.





Remember what it was like seeing Elizabeth for the first time after all those months? You were suppose to meet Lauren to get your materials, but there she was, walking out of the dining hall to welcome the "new arrival". When you saw her you couldn't wait, but ran out to her. She gave you a big squeeze and said, I didn't know it was you I was coming to greet. Remember you couldn't stop smiling? It felt good to be with her again.



Remember when Elizabeth asked all the instructors, on the spot, to share with everyone (the group of 200) their favorite most inspiring teacher? There were several names you could have picked, but it was Adam that kept coming to your mind. Of all the things in your life you could learn he has taught you about some of the most important -- love and sacrifice.





Remember that first night sitting around the fire meeting all the other woman in your cabin? They were all teachers and you loved learning what each of them specialized in. There are some seriously creative people out there -- I'm grateful to know a few more of them.



Remember being thrilled to share a room with the uber talented Helene?  You met her last fall and was grateful to be able to get to know her even better. She has such a delightful french accent too.

Remember the sound of rain gently hitting against the roof as you drifted off the sleep?

[instagrams]

Remember watching Thea walk out of breakfast with that big smile on her face ready to teach her class? As you watched her go you couldn't help, but wonder what that would feel like to you to be heading toward your class the next day. Remember watching her go you never thought you would leave Sunday feeling like she had been missing from your life.

Remember having Thursday to yourself and going for a run after breakfast to clear your head and get the day of travel off you? It was a beautiful run full of oxygen. Can't believe how little there is at home.



Remember that run is what tempted you to get in the, I don't know, 50 degree lake? It was freezing, but I was so warm I was willing to go for it. I think Jill, who was on the dock knitting, must have thought I was insane, mostly because I was taking self portraits.



Remember what it as like meeting Tory, the wedding photographer that was the videographer for the week, for the first time? You're not sure you made such a good impression as you asked her to please stay away from you with her video camera. You should have known by her response that you would end up friends by weeks end.





Remember the first time you heard Time by Jonatha Brooke and you were speechless? Jonatha sat in the cabin all afternoon, as you were reviewing your class and making some last minute adjustments, getting ready for her performance that night. When she sings, she shines.

Remember when you and Jen Gray helped her, Jonatha, with her presentation and listened to the stories of her mom while laughing and crying? Loosing a loved one definitely has a way of connecting and bonding you together -- funny how so many of us have been touched by it.



Remember how fabulous her show was? How she made you think about what is most important in life? She is an amazing storyteller.



Remember when you talked to Adam and gave him the highlights and he mentioned ever so slightly to look for something in the mail? Even with his best efforts of sending the package the week before it didn't make it in time. It finally did show up at home the Thursday after you got back. In it was summer shoes, a mixed cd full of good music, and a little note. you are so blessed.

Remember sitting around the fire thinking you should go and get your camera, but getting so pulled into the conversation you never did?

Remember, before the group photo at Long House Friday morning, playing with the gorgeous east light and taking self portraits with Alena and Thea and how much they made you laugh? You don't know why you still find it amazing how quickly connections can form for the smallest of encounters.





Remember the warmth and the sun? There were moments of rain, but for the most part it was sunny and perfect.

Remember seeing your classroom space for the first time? After the group photo you began to set up your room so you would be ready after lunch. It was a great space, much darker than you had anticipated, but cozy nevertheless.





Remember all the little goodies scattered throughout?







Remember walking back slowly to your cabin taking pictures along the way enjoying your surroundings, the sounds and smell of squam lake? I loved having more time to roam and enjoy where I was before moving onto the next thing.


to be continued...