This feeling I recognize as being something you only feel after the fact. While you're going through it, it's crazy and overwhelming, but afterwards it's so easy to see the good and you wonder, was it really that hard? I think in many ways it is if you stop to think about it, but as mothers we push along because there's not really another option, and at the end of the day we really do love what we're doing and the individuals we are doing it for.
I wonder with each stage that passes if there will be this longing? In reality, I love where we're at right now. I love the ages of my girls and have often thought if I could freeze time it would be now...this place where they don't know who Hannah Montana is, they don't have a lot of stresses, they're talking to us instead of texting us, we still have relative control, and the world is still this magical place. It will be a really hard day when my girls have to face something I cannot protect them from, we have face some of those already (ie with friends), and it's difficult when I can't make everything better... Sigh. I guess at some point we must all learn.
[sunday night popcorn and funniest home videos]
And so the nature of life continues to move on. With each stage there is a passing and also something to look forward to. I wonder will we ever look back on this life and long for it, just a bit, because it's behind us. Will we think it wasn't that hard? I wonder.
So I take these little moments of remembrance when they come and embrace them, but keep myself focused on the present so when this time is gone I will have no regrets only fond fond memories.
6 comments:
I have the same feelings. I constantly wonder if I'm ready to be out of the baby stage...really ready. The wondering gets me wondering further if the wondering means I'm not ready or if I'm merely nostalgic, which I have always been.
Good thoughts. Glad you had a chance to snuggle with a niece too:)
Love this post, Amy! I agree. I have had similar thoughts over the past few months while I have been up at night with Lyla. It is so easy when you are in a "stage" that is a little challenging to wish it away. I am trying so hard not to do that. Lyla may very well be my last & I am trying to savor every single minute.
I think when you're in the middle of it, it really is that hard. It's only in retrospect that the difficulty is somewhat forgotten (kind of like childbirth!) and you're left with nostalgia.
Still, I do find myself wondering from time to time if I'm ready to be done with baby- and toddlerhood. I think I am, but sometimes it's hard to think about being done, too. Just one of the many strange and wonderful things about motherhood, I guess.
So far, I long for all the stages of the past and wonder how to remain sane in the present - currently, the teen years.
I know we'll think it wasn't that hard, because hind sight is, as we all know, 20/20.
I have had thoughts like this all week and here you are expressing them so perfectly. The older my girls are getting, the more nostalgic I think I am becoming and some weeks I LOVE who and what they are at this moment, whereas others I am just praying for time to speed ahead.
I love what you said in your last paragraph. THAT is what I want from life!
what an amazing post. My dad often says that Eternity will be like revisiting every time in your life that you loved and experiencing it over and over again. I think what you wrote was brilliant in a sense that you have this serenity about it. I love to be calm and quiet, and soo many times Jill tells me to do so, and I still don't put the brakes. I love to see someone doing so.
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