I have nothing to complain about, well, I guess I can think of a few things.
But despite trying to be optimistic I have had a very rough week. The kind where I don't quite feel myself. Like I'm in some type of time warp and I can't get myself back to the here and now. It has been really hard on me and I find myself in pensive state.
And when I feel this way I pull away. I hide. Retreat. I can't deal with myself and the world seems so much more daunting. I have thought many times about blogging, but what does complaining do? I didn't want to feel validated I wanted to feel myself, to get to that point I felt good again, where I felt I was giving instead of pulling others down with me.
Today I can see the light. I never know where comes or how it goes, but how grateful I am when it leaves me. I attribute a lot of my changing state to the friends who have contacted me in the last few days, who have given me something with each interaction. I was reading the January ensign yesterday about service and how allowing others to serve you is Heavenly Father's way of helping you. I had never really thought about it that way, but it makes so much sense. To someone like me who resists help, thinking surely I can do it without, just realized I was resisting the answers I was seeking. So thank you to those who have taken your time for me. For offering whether I took you up on it or not. It has meant more to me than you will know.
So here is to better days. For happy days. For rainbows and clear blue skies. To good light and air conditioned homes. Here's to life and to good friends.
17 comments:
Just wanted to tell you that I stop by your blog every once in a while and I wanted to let you know that I find your posts very inspirational and uplifting! Your photography is amazing- it is the very definition of art. Your images envoke the emotions that are also reflected in your posts. It is a refreshing escape for me to come here. So thank you for your reminders of how good life really is even in it's simplicity.
I can completely relate, I go to that place more than I would like. It always feels good to come out of it. You have been in my thoughts a lot this week, I am glad things are looking up
Glad you are feeling more yourself. I think we all have days or weeks like that. In fact I'm pretty sure mine was last week. This week has been much better. Thankfully.
I also really loved that quote from the January Ensign, it is very true, and I try to remember that always.
I hate it when I feel like retreating from everything because it usually spirals into a major funk. I have to actively work to fight the funk by forcing myself to get out and do something, listening to upbeat music and planning & sending good mail (it works every time). I'm glad you're feeling better.
You are amazing. I don't know you personally, but I know you through your blog and photos, and I have to say, coming to your blog, and reading your words..it's one of my favorite things to do during the week. (Sounds lame..I know. But it's true. :D) Hang in there..there's something good in everything around you...
I can relate so well to this post. I never know where my pensive states will take me. It's so hard to let others help you, even when it's exactcly what you need. I've noticed you haven't been posting this week and thought maybe life has been hectic. I'm all for happy days ahead, always with good friends to share them with, or get us there.
Hey - I found you through Design Mom. I do appreciate your aesthetic.
Just an observation - your post about a full heart and then your post about retreat remind me of the cycles in the Book of Mormon. Highs and lows my friend, ebbs and flows, "it must needs be that there is an opposition in all things."
Thanks for sharing with us.
I'm so glad you posted about this. I have been in a slump too and feel like retreating. I resist help most of the time but when I allow someone to help me I feel tons better.
Glad clear blue skies are back for you. Soak up the sun.
Such great thoughts Amy. I hope you have a sunnier brighter weekend!
So happy things are looking up today!
I am so glad to hear that the clear skies are ahead. The hardest part (for me) of feeling the need to retreat is that I'm never sure when it is going to happen. Out of nowhere, I can feel like that. Thanks for sharing, we all need reminders that service helps both ends.
I'm glad you are feeling better. Last week was like that for me, and it's frustrating and hard to snap back. I liked your thoughts on letting people help you. I am so not good at letting people do that -- definitely something to work on.
Happy mother's day Amy, hopefully you are feeling better now. miss your posts.
Happy Mother's Day!
here's to happy mother's day!
I know all about wanting to retreat and pull away from others, from everything. Such a miserable place to be. And it can be so hard to allow others to help. But every time I do, I am just filled with gratitude. Will I ever learn that lesson for real? for good? Glad you are back in the light.
oh amy, thank you for your honesty.
glad things are looking bright again
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